I've been a runner for 30 years.

I've been an unapologetic feminist since I learned the definition.

I've dedicated my life to designing performance apparel for both professional and recreational women athletes.

And I've become fluent in the art of Enclothed Cognition - the social and psychological science of understanding how apparel can give us a mental edge. 

And yet every day, I objectify myself.

Why? Because I am a woman. I didn't wake up like this, but I learned it soon after.

To paraphrase writer and art historian John Berger:

"To be born a woman has been to be born into the keeping of men. But this has been at the cost of a woman's self being split into two. A woman must continually watch herself. She is almost continually accompanied by her own image of herself. While she is walking across a room or while she is weeping at the death of her father, she can scarcely avoid seeing herself walking or weeping. From earliest childhood she has been taught and persuaded to survey herself continually."

I had an awakening recently as to how guilty I remain in my own objectification.

It was a couple of years ago when I received a beautiful gift from my husband, what we jokingly referred to as the Queen Shoes... a gorgeous pair of jet black Jimmy Choo kitten heels.

My heart was joyous. I loved the way they made me look.

But my feet hurt like hell.

How was it I was one woman, the same woman, with two so divergent views of empowerment? One that was in full view, and that I had embraced as my calling in life. And one that lurked in my heart unseen.

Similar to privilege, it's so omnipresent, we don't even see it.

"To be born a woman has been to be born into the keeping of men." The kicker is that it doesn't have to even be a man. The social construct lives inside us.

And in 1972, Title IX happened. Suddenly we had sport. And we had a lifestyle of sport. And body movement fueled our minds, our souls, our relationships with others.

Our eyes were opened. Our tolerance for things that hurt us decreased. We began to see these body negative styles for what they were... controlling, and even debilitating. (It's worth noting that a woman in high heels is incapable of our two most important responses to danger: fight or flight. She is a victim in waiting).

These tricks of the mind. These acts of oppression that we don't even see because they are deeply embedded in our female souls. We might not be able to eliminate them completely. Maybe we don't want to.

But in my mind, it's all about awareness.

Pro and Muse Lauren Fleshman reminds us fashion should be built for a life in motion. Bodies are made to move.

The minute women decide they don't want to be uncomfortable in their shoes and clothing is the minute the market offerings will change.

And while it might be easy to dismiss the possibility of high design and high comfort. I believe that is exactly the opportunity at hand. There are a vast array of beautiful fabrics, flattering silhouettes, sleek shoes, and gorgeous accessories that can be drawn together for the body-positive goal.

The good news: it's already happening. And athletic apparel companies are uniquely positioned to take what we know about body movement to clothing that works in all aspects of your life.

While many businesses look at consumers on a spectrum, from sedentary to active, we prefer to see the athlete within, at the center, at all times. And if there is an athlete at the center at all times, then her athlete body is respected by all of her clothing - even the fancy ones.

We've started down that path, and are eager to do more.

A tip: every day, once you are dressed, close your eyes and ask yourself "how do I feel?" and "how do I think I'll feel in six hours?" And if the answer is "probable foot pain" or "a dug-in underwire," it might be time to break up with that garment. Take it off. Thank it for its service.

Then, ask yourself - how do I want to feel today? What clothes make me feel that way. Define your powersuit, and wear it loud and proud in the world.

I’m finding my powersuit, and I can’t wait to see yours.

In running and in life, mantras — positive affirmations — are super helpful because they anchor you in the present and cut through any chaos and negativity in your mind. They help you to press pause on memories and projections, expectations and perceptions, so that you can more bravely go into what’s actually happening right here, right now. They help you find gratitude for the moment, no matter what it brings you, and to manage any challenge more easefully.

Try it: I am. Here now.

• Inhale: I am…
• Exhale: … here now…
• Continue repeating the words to yourself, in your head, for 2–5 minutes

Breathe deeply and pay attention. Do this and you’re doing it right.

For a guided version, try this Race Day Meditation from The 26.2 Collection, a new Jasyoga video series designed to help you optimize your marathon training — and beyond.

Dear Queen Shoes,

We need to talk. I can’t hang out with you anymore.

I mean, I love what you stand for: my husband’s generosity and your commitment to design. But I’ve changed. And I don’t think we’re a great fit anymore. In fact, I don’t think we ever fit very well. You thought you could shape me into your image, but it wasn’t the real me.

I love your jet black leather and your fierce kitten heel, but I just can’t. It’s over. We’ve awkwardly wobbled down our last road together. And I’m not carrying you around anymore - at dance parties and weddings - when I’ve lost all patience. I keep thinking it will be different next time, but it never is.

And I hate to say it, shoes, but I think you’ve lost touch. None of my friends want to date shoes like you either. It’s really difficult to say this, but I think we’ve just outgrown you. We’ve been to the mountain top. (No, literally, we’ve been to the mountain top). And you just wouldn’t cut it there.

I need something more. I hope you’ll understand.

xoxo

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Dear Flyers, 

Competition, it’s a funny thing. Working hard towards something, always seeking for faster times, better performances. It fills me up. It’s the most joyful way of living I could ever imagine. It makes me the best version of myself. But with training and competition, comes the constant flux between past and future. My mind in constant flip flop. I’ve run x time in the past, I want to run x time in the future. These thoughts make it easy to skip over the present. And when it comes down to it, the present moment is all we really have. 

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. With my own running, with my coaching of others, watching my teammates train and prepare for competition. The other day, post long run in one of my favorite places of all time, I did something I often rush over. I took a moment to close my eyes and take it all in. The smell of the aspens, the sweat on my face, the sweet satisfaction of a long run done. I felt grateful for all that my body allows me to do, the encouragement I receive from my teammates and coach, the opportunity to live in a place that I love, for my husband's support, and for my two boys I had waiting for me at home.

It was a moment that brought it all home for me. A moment that made me realize just how fortunate I am. Just as the body benefits from movement, the mind benefits from stillness. When the body and mind come together, we feel good because we are thoroughly engaged. There is such power in pressing pause each day to appreciate where we are, what we have, and the work that we do.

I am constantly on the move. Rushing between training, coaching, and momming my two boys, but I’m realizing the power in making gratitude a daily habit. And it’s something I want to do more of. 

So, this is my March challenge to YOU. Keep dreaming big, keep putting in the work, but add in one more component. Make room to press pause each day. To breathe in and breathe out. To take in the moment. To give yourself credit and thanks for all that you do. Don’t skip the present. Align the body and the mind and make room for gratitude in your life.  

Share your mindful moments and reflections with #PressPause 

Wheels Up!

- Steph

#WheelsUp17 is a series made for the motivated — a monthly challenge designed to help you see your runway and takeoff. With pro and coach Steph Bruce at the helm, and the power of the Oiselle community by your side — it’s just the right push to help you pull up your wheels and soar!

SIGN UP & STAY MOTIVATED!

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BY: CHRISTINE BABCOCK

Transitions. Sometimes in life they come easily, like a slow path leading you to the final destination, with no detours or unexpected bumps along the way. Other times they come abruptly, like a door slammed in your face.

My relationship with running has had both. The slow, steady build up that led to opportunities to run in college and post-collegiately. The diagnoses of injuries in college that felt like closed doors, but ones I was determined to open again by dedicating countless hours to cross training and PT exercises.

The summer of 2015 felt different. Surgery and such a long recovery process felt like a closed door that I didn’t have the motivation to knock on until it opened. I transitioned from running 60 miles a week to crutching around. For 12 weeks I did nothing. I learned to operate as one who did zero physical activity and was okay with it. I found I could cheer on others and support them in their running journey with no strings attached. For the first time in my life, running had no hold on my life. I couldn’t run and I was still me.

When the 16-week mark came and I was cleared to run 1 minute, I did so with much trepidation. I was excited to try running, but at the same time, I had a taste of life without running and much to my surprise, it wasn’t completely terrible. The ability to start running again meant I had to navigate another transition. What did running look like moving forward? Do I get to a place where I can just run and enjoy the outdoors and company of running buddies, or do I see if my body can handle training again?

The first few months were joy-filled runs trying to stick with my in-shape friends, relishing in the opportunity to be out there again. Then there were the workouts I jumped in to help friends out. The taste of working out and doing some local 5ks “for fun” put those “what if” questions in my mind. What if I tried to reach a high level of training? Could I do it? How would my foot handle it? Did I even want to do it?

I committed half-heartedly. I starting doing workouts of increasing intensity, picked some local races as gauges of fitness, and decided to see where it would go. It was less than perfect, but it was the space in my heart and life that running could hold. It felt weird to commit half-heartedly, as my nature is to jump in all or none, but in this season, it was healthy.

Weeks turned into months and months turned into a year. With each race, I progressed a little further. I found mental games to play with myself to get through the solo workouts when I found myself asking why. And then I felt that small tug, recognizing that all along this was a slow path leading me to a destination that I would not have embraced in the beginning.

It is time to transition, to no longer half-heartedly commit. Doing so has protected my heart from the potential of getting hurt again, but at the same time it is keeping me from really seeing what I can do. And while there is no guarantee that it will go anywhere, running is calling and I must go.  I’m choosing to jump in with two feet and lay it all on the line. This means moving back to Bend, embracing the invitation to transition and seeing what happens. While there is no guarantee that it will go anywhere, I am stepping out, not missing out on the possibility of what could be. Back to Bend I go!

Following an abrupt divorce, Volée teammate Asia Dawn, stepped outside of her comfort zone and embarked on an unconventional path towards self-discovery. She had the courage to start over and write a new story for herself. It is one of strength and resilience through running and travel.  

My husband left me shortly after our wedding day. I didn’t see it coming. Shocked, I moved back in with my parents and quit my job. Now I’m living out of a backpack in Latin America and getting to know myself all over again. This new chapter of my life entails some serious soul-searching.

As I watched my relationship collapse in slow motion, it felt like a lot of things were happening to me. I certainly didn’t want the divorce. I didn’t want to be on my own for the first time in 10 years. I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want the change that I so often craved. I had the support of friends and family to help me get through a very turbulent time. I became more involved with Oiselle meet ups and my yoga community. My best friend encouraged me to stick to my original plan of 31 runs in 31 days, even if I only made it one mile because every step was filled with tears. I tried hard to take control by taking care of myself while the world was spinning around me. It was a period filled with uncertainty, but I was never alone.

Slowly I started to move forward. I was ready to do something for me and wanted to make a positive change in my life. So, I bought a one-way ticket to Ecuador and quit my corporate job. I had never done anything so extreme! Travel has always been something that lights me up, so I decided to listen to my heart and observe what it needed to heal. I’d always done what society would expect out of someone like me, a “good girl.” I went to university, worked a stable job, went back to grad school, and continued on my career path. This decision was completely out of the box... and it filled me with excitement, anticipation, and hope. I couldn’t remember the last time I had made a decision that felt so good. Scary, but good.

I started to research Ecuador because I didn’t know much about it. In fact, I hadn’t heard it mentioned much outside of the Galápagos. It turns out that Ecuador is a beautiful place and one of the most bio diverse countries in the world. It has over 1,600 bird species... #headupwingsout! I stayed in Quito for 3 weeks when I first arrived and volunteered at a children’s summer camp. I had to speak only in Spanish, which immediately moved me out of my comfort zone. Yes, I had studied español in college, but it had been years since I used it. I was able to brush up on my language skills, but more importantly, these kids taught me not to take myself so seriously. Some came from traditional households while others were orphans. I fell in love with their smiles and laughter. It felt good to love again.

I moved on to the coast and rebuilt homes for families affected by the earthquake that killed nearly 700 people. These families had been living in temporary shelters, sometimes with only a tarp over their heads. I picked up my first power drill, and I learned how to work with bamboo. The Ecuadorians showed me how to live with less, and every day I was reminded to be grateful for what we already have. You never know when your circumstances may change.  

I continued my journey north into Colombia, Panama, and Costa Rica. I traveled on public buses, slept in hammocks, tents, and bunk beds, and surrounded myself with good people. I went for a run with my own personal bodyguard and danced the night away in salsa clubs. I became more in tune with nature and spent a lot of time alone reflecting. Nature does wondrous things for the soul. I hiked for hours and sometimes for days. I swam in the Pacific. I swam in the Caribbean. I visited remote jungle and desert locations inaccessible by roads. I traveled for 21 painfully slow hours on a cargo ship. I learned the art of patience and how to be patient with myself as well. This wasn’t going to be a quick fix; I still had a ways to go. I began to accept that things aren’t always in my control, and consequently, I learned how to let things go too. I lived this new way of life to the fullest extent of my being and noticed my heart beginning to swell with happiness. I absorbed and embodied all of these experiences, and slowly, I began to heal.

With each new encounter and with each decision I make, I learn something new about myself. I’ve learned that I’m stronger than I ever realized. I’ve learned how independent I am. I’m not only able to live on my own for the first time in 10 years, but I’m also confident enough to explore Latin America as a solo female traveler. Definitely adding THAT to my resume! I’m learning to accept my past and am no longer ashamed to share my imperfect story. This new beginning started off uncomfortable and scary. But it evolved into something raw, honest, and eye-opening. If I wasn’t forced to take a new path, if my life wasn’t shaken up in unexpected ways, if I never bought that one-way ticket, I may have never started on this journey to truly find myself.


I’m over 6 months into this one-way flight and not sure where it will take me next. Coach Steph described this “wheels up moment” as “where a grand dream meets doubt, limits, and discomfort” and I say cheers to that! This year, I resolve to continue to follow my heart and listen to my gut, no matter how crazy or unconventional it may seem. And I encourage you to do the same.

- Asia Dawn

Big goals aren’t achieved overnight. The bigger the goal, the longer the road. What you do each day is an investment to be cashed in down the road. Part of the investment is the training — the miles, the speed work, the lifting, the drills. But the secret to optimizing your effort is to stay balanced even as you work hard. As runners, we can best accomplish this by investing in pre-hab and recovery, recognizing that what we do when we're not running can be just as important and equally as productive as our mileage. Ultimately, sustaining balance increases our durability and resilience, which we need to do big things. 

We love how many #wheelsup17 goals involve our yoga partner, Jasyoga. We've partnered with #athletesforyoga leader Erin Taylor over the years to bring practical yoga solutions to your real running and life needs and we're seeing runners of all kinds become more balanced and resilient as a result. 

Looking for inspiration to keep that Jasyoga #wheelsup17 goal going? Here are the top 5 yoga for runners routines from the past year:

BEST OF JASYOGA

1. Yoga For Runners: Strengthen Your Running Core

2. Jasyoga Meditation: Thank Your Body

3. Hip Flexor Fix

4. 3 Best Recovery Stretches For Runners

5. Woman Up Against Women Imbalances

If you haven't tried Jasyoga Video yet, use code WIN2017 for a month of free access to 70+ online routines at video.jasyoga.com! Lead by example with #athletesforyoga + #wheelsup17

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Introducing a special Oiselle project to turn old race bibs into new works of art. Mail us your old race bibs, or bring them into our flagship store in University Village, to be included the work and listed as a collaborating artist.

We were so energized by Sally's Mentor blog that we wanted to get in on the action! You can't always predict when an important figure is going to show up in your life, and sometimes only in retrospect can you appreciate their role. Here is a big thank you to these mentors, from CBabs, Feather, and I.  

LESKO 

This is my body, move on. When I was an impressionable first year medical student at U. Penn, we were split into single-sex groups for clinical exam instruction. One of our professors, Sigrid Veasey was teaching us heart and lung exams: where to listen for murmurs, how to feel the PMI (point of maximal impulse of the heart muscle), etc. She was 7 months pregnant with twins, and without fanfare stripped down on top to just a sports bra. Her pregnant belly was glorious and impressive, and her PMI was hard to find between the top of her belly and the bottom of her left breast. And she didn't give a fig. "This a woman's body, this is what it can do. Just get your work done and learn how to do this exam properly." Beautiful message for a group of young ambitious women. I've never forgotten it. Reminds me of another one of my heroes (hey Fleshy!), and also helped me approach my own pregnancies. 

How to be a mother. When I moved up to Seattle, I was excited to learn that one of my friends from running days was here: Mindy (Schneider) Leffler. I had trained with her for a year when I was out of college and she was still at Georgetown--she was always fierce and no-fuss. I was excited to reconnect with her. And then I learned that her oldest son (who is the same age as my youngest) had been diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. And I didn't know how to approach her, because the idea of bearing that burden made me want to turn my heart off. And then I started running a bit with Mindy, and going to her fundraisers for Aidan, and I started learning.  A few lessons Mindy has taught me: 

1. Even when something feels unbearable, just keep going. 
2. There is no limit to the advocacy you can do for your children. 
3. Even when you have big problems, it doesn't mean small problems don't bother you. 
4. You learn the essence of people by how they respond in a crisis. 
5. It's ok to laugh, even when you are crying. 

I am so grateful to have Mindy's beautiful family and wisdom in my life. 

CHRISTINE

My high school coach, Coach Varvas. He taught me the power of setting goals and to not be afraid of the process and pain that you go through to achieve those goals. He showed me the value of hard work, positive thinking, and how your biggest breakthroughs often come in those moments where the risk of failure is greatest. I appreciate how he was always there to support me, encourage me, and push my buttons; never letting me settle for less than my potential. 

Jenn, a mentor from high school. She has remained a friend and confidant through the years. She has taught me the importance of being vulnerable, staying true to yourself, and following your heart, even if it may not be what people would expect of you. I appreciate the way she listens and asks questions in such a way that forces me to discover what is right. Her encouragement to press into hard things has led to some of the greatest shifts in my perspective and understanding, which I would have missed had I tried to ignore it.

HEATHER

I have never in my life met anyone like Sarah Lesko. She's my muse. My mentor for work, for running, and for life. Her generosity and genuine care for others runs deeper than anyone I've ever met. I remember the first time I told her one of my goals in running, I felt really apprehensive about sharing it with her. I did my usual over explanation with lots of "I don't knows" and "maybe I can'ts", and she just looked at me and listened. And really heard me. AND really believed in me. That winter she jumped in workouts with me, asked me how I was doing along the way, and just generally supported me in my pursuit. I'm not a pro, but she made me feel like one. She made me really believe. 

I'm not the only one she does this for. In fact, I see her extend her big heart to others on a daily basis. I strive to live life like she does, and inspire others the way she does. I hope to be half the mentor she is for someone else. 

BY: JENN HAROWICZ

We were standing in the kitchen and I asked my husband, "Do we try for a third kid or do I try out for roller derby?" It was a funny conversation. In the end, we realized it was time for this work-from-home-mom-of-two-boys to get out of the house and have something she called her own. I felt a pull to try something new – so why not roller derby? Go big or go home was my attitude.

After two incredibly challenging tryouts, an intense six week bootcamp, and ten months after that initial conversation in the kitchen, I landed a spot on the Rat City Rollergirls, Seattle’s flat-track roller derby league. I had no idea what I was getting myself into, but I knew that it was crazy different, exciting, scary, and out of my comfort zone – just the change that I needed.

It was the beginning of a chapter. The beginning of a four year love-hate relationship that would set the tone for trying, failing, taking risks, being vulnerable, diving head first into new adventures, and challenging me both physically and mentally. That was 2009.

So I was now “Know Mercy” and a member of a league of strong-willed, tough, independent, badass women with many different personalities… some that I'd connect with, some that I would not. After two months, the voices in my head starting saying “What the fuck are you doing? - You’re not as good as them. - Is this really you? - Are you tough enough? - Can you get knocked down, physically and mentally, and get back up?” I listened to those negative thoughts and decided I was better off being a fan in the stands than a skater on the track. After some tough conversations, I was encouraged by my coaches and my husband to stick with it, that I had worked too hard to get where I was.

When I told friends and family that I was now a roller derby girl, many said “I can’t picture you doing roller derby” – it was the start of proving to myself and to others that it WAS in me. And I soon found out that dreaming big and trying something wild and crazy, especially when you’re a mom in her mid thirties, would be inspiring to others around me. The negative thoughts were not going to magically disappear but I had to hold tight to that drive, that need for something of my own, and also set an example for my kids to push through the highs and lows and take a chance at things big and scary.

Fast-forward four years. I found myself spread way too thin and it was time for the chapter to end. I had been challenged like nothing I’d experienced before. I had pushed my body in ways that I had never imagined. I had skated in front of amazing crowds. I had beat myself up mentally, and physically. I had been a part of something big and created some lasting memories. I had the best fans ever and an enormous amount of support from family and friends. I hadn’t broken any bones. I had experienced a sisterhood of women and made some cool friendships. The highs and lows of these four years were crazy and emotional but damn, I did it, and I was proud. It was so much more than skating.

Two months after retiring from skating, my husband and I were in a serious roll-over car accident which set us back physically for a while and put life into perspective. I soon found myself feeling very blah and in the need of a physical activity. This “something” needed to be simple. Besides playing softball and participating in a few fun 5k’s, I hadn’t run much. The simplicity of the workout was appealing. Seattle’s three mile Green Lake loop was the easiest location to hit after dropping my sons off at school. It started out as a “just get fit quick” idea, not knowing that I would soon find myself pushing my boundaries. I remember texting my husband “I just made it half way around without stopping”… then a couple weeks later “I just made it all the way around without stopping”. I found myself falling in love with running and once again, I had something to call my own. This time, it was on my schedule, it was freeing, it started the tone for my day, and I felt success at the end of every run.

Well, my “go big or go home” attitude kicked in and I found myself wanting to know what’s next. I wasn’t just going to run, to run. I wanted to push myself further and see what I could do. Dream big. I remember being inspired by another skater who had retired and started running races. So I set a goal to finish my first full marathon before my 40^th birthday. I had no idea what that looked like but I was going for it. I read, I trained, I figured it out, and I did it, running my first full the week before my birthday. I pushed my body and mind, and was hooked.

It’s been four years since that first run around the lake, and so far this chapter has no end. I knew this relationship was going to be one with more love than hate. I know it will always have its challenges, both physically and mentally, but it’s been an incredible journey so far. A journey that has again brought new friends into my life, amazing experiences, cool trips and memories for me and my family, and a magical sense of freedom and clarity that is beneficial in so many ways. I’ve set some high goals along the way, pushed myself beyond what I thought I could do, and am currently training for my sixth marathon, BOSTON! It’s exciting to once again show myself, my boys, and others around me that we have the strength within us to do anything we set our sights on. It’s so much more than running.

Head up, wings out!

Jenn aka "Know Mercy”